Freedom, A Cool Wind That Burns Your Face – Part I
Tiny Tom:I’m frightened! Bobby: As well you should be. Freedom is scary. It’s a blast of cool wind that burns your face to wake you up. – Run, Freedom, Run from Urinetown the Musical Greetings gentle...
View ArticleExistential Freefall – Part II
This is the second part of a two part series, for part I, see Existential Freefall – Part I So in my last post, I explained the background and issues I was taking into my session last Friday (and then...
View ArticleExistential Freefall – Part I
I was going to name this post “Existential Freefall or What I’ve Been Trying to Remember for 20 years (Well, 50 Really)” but that seemed a bit unwieldy, even for me, so I went with the shorter version....
View ArticleHoly Water by Big and Rich
I was listening to an OLD playlist on Itunes that I haven’t listened to in quite some time, and a song I had forgotten about popped up. It’s an incredibly powerful and moving song about healing from...
View ArticleA Re-enactment or How Transference is a B**** Part II
This is the second part of a two part series, part one can be found here. So I showed for the next session, prepared to tackle the topic again. After telling him quite emphatically that I did not want...
View ArticleA Re-enactment or How Transference is a B**** Part I
Greetings gentle readers, I’m back from vacation, which was quite refreshing. I have not been blogging for several reasons: work was a bit busy (I am the technical documentation department so nothing...
View ArticleThe Ache of Longing and Loss
Greetings gentle readers, I know my posting has been rather scant lately. I have been doing some really intense work in therapy and sometimes when I am in the midst of deep work, it can be hard to...
View ArticleAmbivalence, thy name is mother
I am feeling… ambivalent. It is my mom’s birthday tomorrow, her 78th. We have been estranged for over a year since my birthday last March. Long story, which I have told elsewhere, but she was given...
View ArticleWanted, not needed, to go
Greetings dear readers, First I want to say thank you to all of you who commented and read my last post (Therapy isn’t enough Redux) and all the support you offered. There was a lot of very wise...
View ArticlePeeking out of the Cave
Greetings Gentle Readers, I have missed you all. This break has stretched longer than I anticipated. The situation that precipitated my hiatus is ongoing, but things are much more stable. Of course...
View ArticleReliving the Shame
I just had a deep insight into shame (which I suspect is going to sound D’oh when I say it) that I want to write down before I forget. I have been doing some rather intense work in therapy lately,...
View ArticleThe Repair Part II
This is the second part of a two-part series, for the first part see The Repair Part I. I ended the last post having just done a bag up job of expressing my anger at BN. I told him that it had felt...
View ArticleThe Repair Part I
I am back with the promised account of my last session. This post is the first of two (it got REALLY long). It was a very long, very intense session, so I’ll do my best to describe what happened. As in...
View ArticleDisruption and Rage Part II
TW*** CSA, rage and really bad language For the first part, see Disruption and Rage Part I. NOTE: I have really appreciated everyone reading and all the supportive comments. I am planning on replying...
View ArticleDisruption and Rage Part I
TW*** CSA, rage and really bad language Well, I think I have hidden in my cave long enough and its time to poke my head out and talk about what is going on with me. I am most of the way through a four...
View ArticleSome Handy Links
Greetings all, just a quick post to provide some useful information. I am working on a post to talk about how I am actually doing but its slow going. Promise I’ll get there eventually. But in the...
View ArticlePeeking out
Hi All, I’m attempting to come back out and play, but its a bit harder (and more complicated) than I thought it would be. Of course, when isn’t it? First, I want to say thank you so much to everyone...
View ArticleWhy keep going back?
***Trigger warning: Religious content, I talk about my Christian faith in pretty specific terms late in the post. A reader emailed to ask me a question whose answer I thought would make a good topic...
View ArticleSitting
Greetings Gentle Readers, I know I have been quiet as of late. News of both my brother’s death and my aunt’s revelations have knocked me off-balance and sent me back into my past in a way that has not...
View ArticleWorking Through
Greetings Gentle Readers, First, may I say thank you so much for all the encouragement and support from everyone? Knowing I am not alone, knowing that there are safe people, that there are people I can...
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